Do you remember the cartoons "Love is..."? They were all cute and romantic sort of things and if anything geared towards what is known as eros or romantic love. The ideal of love in the modern age our hearts all a flutter with Mills and Boon with proclamations of undying love or else deviant interests in our personal and collective sexuality. These are in a manner of speaking what we are used to when it comes to the expression of love. There is a commitment there but it is a commitment to our own needs once more, it is idyllic and often times we find such expressions overly sweet or else to raw for us to manage in our own selves. It is often the most common expression of love that we think of when we think of love. However, there are, according to some, other expressions of love which are little regarded today simply because we do not think about them. Some of these are portrayed in films and other cinematic genres or else in books.
The most common love that we see almost everyday in one form or another is storge. This is the love that is seen between a parent and a child. It is the natural bond that forms between a mother and a child or a parent and their children. It is totally empathetic. It has its strengths within the family but on a wider basis can often lead to jealousy as we believe someone else is getting more attention then ourselves. Indeed in the world today perhaps a lot of our own troubles within the family and within the community can be seen to be a poor understanding and strengthening of this type of love. We allow and often encourage others to become jealous by the way we act rather than encouraging our own bonds of storge within the family situation. Siblings believe that one or the other has a better deal than ourselves when it comes to love being returned to us. This leads to disruptions in the nature of our empathetic bonds and thus the breakdown in values within the family.
The third form of love that we experience in the world is seen more often in the movies and in the literature genres. If and when it is seen in life we often pass it over and do not pay much heed to it. Yet, philia is perhaps one of those things that can forge bonds in society and in our communities to a greater extent than we would seem to think. Philia is the bond formed between two people that bring them together as friends and as supporters of each other. This is the bond that forms between ourselves when we hold values and interests in common. It can perhaps be seen more often in rural communities where lasting bonds are formed but is also found in other communities and groups. This is often portrayed in films where a group bonds together or two people bond together to form the 'ideal' team or group. It is the bond of friendship that is characterised in the Bible by Jonathon and David. It is a bond that often brings a community together in the face of disaster and it is a bond that lasts over a lifetime. However, it is a bond that is or can show the fatal side as it can disrupt community as much as it can build community due to its specific nature.
The fourth form of love that is spoken about is something that we must all strive for as this is the love that we speak about when we talk about the incarnation and the presence of God. This is agape love. This love is not often seen within society as society deliberately, in the current age, denies the presence of this love through its manipulation of a self greed and wants. Agape love transcends the individual it is more than just one or two people coming together this love is about an unconditionality over and above storge. It reaches out to all irrespective of who or what is at the centre of that love. It pays no attention to the divides that we humans create in the world around us and it is against and duality that we introduce that causes division. This is God's unconditional love which is brought about when we encompass the incarnation in our hearts and allow God to lead us in our relationships rather than our own needs and wants.
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