Fear that holds us back

I think that this may well be a perennial challenge for us when we look at proclaiming or at least stating our faith beliefs. Often when we are asked with regards our faith we are reluctant to state anything. If you are like me the thing I have an issue with is when someone comes up to you and says "Do you believe in Jesus?". I really want to ask "what do you mean?" as a reply just to ensure that the person speaking is not making a false idol out of the use of the name "Jesus". At this time of year we state quite clearly "Christ is risen! Alleluia!" not "Jesus is risen". That is why we are Christians not Jesusians and we must be very careful with what we proclaim and how we proclaim or state our faith. This I believe leads quite often to fear, fear of being misunderstood or lumped in with others who proclaim voraciously but act as non-Christian as can be. Yet, the risen Christ states to the women on the day of resurrection "Do not be afraid" (Matt 28.10). How then can we understand the manner in which it is acceptable and not cringe-worthy to respond to this challenge of proclamation without fear but with confidence?

Do we like Peter get up and preach in such a manner on the street corner? (Acts 2). I think that it is more important for us today to look at the end of this particular chapter and not at what Peter is doing. We have not just been anointed with the Holy Spirit that led Peter out into the middle of the city but rather we are or should be living the life of a Christ follower. It is in the last verses of this chapter that our attention needs to focus (Acts 2.43-47). This is the community as it begins in terms of fellowship and worship. One of the things that we do not do quite so well is that described in verses 46-47 which for me is the crucial point as it concludes with "And day by day the Lord added new converts to their number". This is past Peter's speech it is the communal aspect that brings new converts. A communal life that is open to all and brings others into contact with the understanding through teaching and fellowship of what the Gospel means in our present day lives. We need to be expressing our faith and preaching the Gospel in the way we live our daily lives by exploring our faith together.

We do not walk alone when we walk with those who share bread (Com-panis - companions)

In moving forward we move together assisting each other much as the two disciples on the walk to Emmaus do. They are speaking together about their faith trying to understand so that when the risen Christ comes into their midst they offer the hospitality of the road joining together and accepting the other. So often in our faith journeys with each other we are prone to close ourselves of from those who look at the scriptures in a different manner to ourselves. We become judgemental in our outlook as we assure ourselves that we read and interpret in the tradition that is "right" without opening ourselves up to the mystery that is God. Who knows what is "right"?; certainly not me. The disciples are open to the ideas propounded by the other and do not dismiss them as being incorrect or wrong or not according to the way they have been taught. The hospitality of the way is an openness to the other so that we can weave our entangled lives together on a path that leads us all to God. It is a hospitality that reaches out to include those who are different from us so that we can discuss our journeys along the interweaving paths of God's graciousness.

Yet, we are afraid. We fear the vulnerability that comes with this type of open hospitality as we cower behind our doors and lives. We are unable to speak clearly of our faith as we suppose that we do not have the "fancy words" that modern society expects in our explanations. We have a fear that we will incorrectly express what God means in our lives and what the risen Christ is to us. We fear the ridicule that comes with disbelief. Most of this fear is a result of our fear that the borders of our neatly prescribed religious beliefs are going to be penetrated and overcome in the language of disbelief that society regales us with. Yet, in clinging so fast to the border we forget that only when these are flexible can we entertain each other in hospitality and generosity showing God's love and grace to the other.

Disruption past, present and future

So we come to our time of joy and celebration. The joy of celebrating the Resurrection to new life with Christ. The reading from Matthew's gospel is perhaps a reading of disruption (Matt. 28.1-10). The first disruption, if we can call it that, is the fact that the focus is on the women at a time when patriarchy was dominant. The second disruption is the removal of the stone which is closely followed by the third disruption which is the appearance of Christ. These three points of disruption are all for us in the past and yet erupt time and again into the present to show us a future, which brings with it the promise of newness and further disruption of our lives. Only when we can perceive the opportunities that are raised by disruption can we see the possibilities of new life in ours. Let us look at each point of disruption that occurs and plumb, certainly not all, some of the depths that are hidden in the story.

Feminist theology has been pointing out for a number of years the in built biases that are present in the scriptures regarding dominance and colonisation of the marginalised groups, including women. Yet in this passage women are brought to the fore in writing that is dominated by maleness. (I am sure there are other more feminist readings that will point out a greater against the grain reading but that is not my intention here). The very fact, however it came about, that there is this specific rendering of fe/maleness in this place at this time is disruptive. It mocks our understanding of relationship and sources of theological rendering of maleness in authority and power. If we are to doubt at any time the role of women in our faith then this is disrupted here in this most important reading on this most important day. A day that tells of new life and change. How we need to disrupt our normal patterns to realise that the patterns of Christ and God are so different from our own way of thinking as we move into a future that is as yet uncertain.

The second disruption (Matt. 28.2) is where there is the appearance of an external agency to roll away the stone that closes the tomb. This is not normal in any one's imagination let alone reality but this is what confronts us in the Gospel. Is it a literary intervention to explain the absence of the closure? Mayhap, it is something to counter the rumours of theft as are recorded in sources external to the Gospels in the canon (see also Matt. 28.11-15)? No matter. We are all, always confronted by the stone that stops us from understanding with faith. There is a consistent blockage for those who live in today's world. This world is based on obtaining knowledge and proof of how things work, made, etc. Previously, our world was based on the ability to have faith and believe that it was so. In some respects we have come from one end of a spectrum to the other in one easy leap. Today, we have no time for things which appear to be fantastical or figments of others imaginations. In some respects we have strengthened the stone that bars our progress towards a relevant understanding. It often takes an intervention to move that rock, a disruption to what we believe to be possible based on proof. It is only when the stone is removed can we really transform our lives by understanding the balance that must pertain between faith and proof through knowledge only then will the stone that blocks our perception be removed.

The final disruption is of course the appearance of Christ, the first of two post Resurrection appearances in Matthew (28.9-10). The appearance is shocking for its unexpectedness as they run back to the others. Suddenly, the risen Christ confronts (not violently) the women as they rush to return. They are forced into a new pattern and set of beliefs by Christ's presence in the world.  We are confronted with the possibility, centred in Christ of new life,  beyond what we understand and know. Beyond belief and even for some beyond faith. This systemic shock to our system imperils our senses and our world. The disruption of the possibility of a new way an alternative understanding confronts us. The question remains for each of us what are we going to do about it?

The disruption of new life brings uncertainty and fear but also joy and love

 In many respects this is what we face now, as we move forward towards a post COVID 19 understanding of the world. The virus has unexpectedly disrupted our lives and we are forced to confront a new future. Just as our thinking of inequality and injustice is disrupted by the centrality of the wo/man so all our previous thinking economic, health, injustice, inequality, etc is disrupted by the pandemic. Just as the wo/men were confronted with an external force lifting the barriers confronting them so to COVID 19 is an exterior force that is making us rethink the barriers facing us in terms of how we cope in a post pandemic world. Can political advantage and disadvantage remain the same, can we overcome the barriers of bias in our thinking of others, etc. Lastly the disruption of Christ and our acceptance of new life lies open before us as we re-think all of our accepted practices and try to bring new life to community and neighbours in a new world.

Celebratory or supplicatory palms

Today, we begin the final steps in the intricate walk towards the cross and the offer of new life found in the resurrection. We begin that journey in celebratory fashion as crowds join together in welcome and we end in a singularity of supplication prior to the final moments. In our services for today mention is made of both moments, initially in songs of praise and celebration and then a moment of silence and drama as we hear the finality of the journey in the reading of the Passion. We take moments from the week to celebrate and participate in but today is really the only day that we bring the whole together and are able to reflect on the aporia of the whole (a celebration of life in death).

In examining the entrance of Christ into the Passover celebration at the beginning of the week (Matt. 21.1-11) we re-live the anticipation of change that many accept into their lives as they come into contact with the living Christ. We are engulfed in passionate response to an accepted and anticipated change that will throw the whole of our known lives into tumult. This is what is happening as the people come to honour the arrival of one who is going to change the very fabric of their daily lives. The challenge to Empire and authority imposed on us from outside is present in the very procession of entry that is reserved only for the Emperor and his representative. This is the expectation as the populace celebrate and we celebrate the start of this day. Prophesy is becoming actuality because today we see it in action as the Messiah the Anointed one arrives in the city of Jerusalem to take over rulership and lead us all into a new life.

In the excitement that engulfs us we little realise what that changes actually augurs for us. In celebrating our coming into new life there has to be confrontation with the old as it attempts to maintain its hold on us. Analogically we can see this as we move through the week and enter into Christ's passion (Matt. 26.14-27.54). The start perhaps is in the offering of food as we begin our new relationship. Just as any friendship really begins in the celebration of hospitality in the presence of new beginnings. Yet almost in the same breath we a brought up short as we recognise that our lives are about to change so drastically that we ourselves will not be the same. How many of us have felt this agony and reluctance almost as we make decisions that are life changing?

In our present aloneness we can find comfort and identification with Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane. The agonising decision to follow through and allow the consequences of his actions to come to fruition as God would have it done. We pray in our desperation for this hour to pass as we too struggle with the consequences of others and our decisions in a world that is so much more connected then it was. Yet, as we mourn the loss of our old world, which will largely be crucified by popular opinion, just like Christ, we will rise into a new life. A new life, which while different, will be the one that brings into the comfort of God's presence in our lives. No longer can we hold to our past assumptions but we must open our eyes to a new understanding of community and neighbourliness.

Do we raise our palms in celebration or in supplication?

So to question whether this Palm Sunday is a Sunday of celebration or supplication is to question ourselves at the start of our own introspective journey to new life. Are we still celebrating the possibilities that have been given to us without realising the agonising decisions that still need to be made? or are we at the point where with Christ later in the week we are praying desperately, not as Christ prays but for our own selfish indecisiveness? Are we truly prepared for the changes that are taking place in our lives? Can we in reality overcome the difficult choices that are to be made and open ourselves to the call of God's Spirit that leads us towards new life in Christ, which begins with our decisions and our acceptance of the consequences?