Lament but grow

 We all know that it is sometimes extremely cathartic to lament as David did over the death of Jonathan (2 Sam 18-27). Indeed the whole of Lamentations is an extreme moment of cathartic liberation. But what comes afterwards? Once we have finished our moment of lament how do we get back into the moment and begin again or rather continue doing that which we have discerned as being the forward movement of the church, our community or ourselves. Sometimes it seems that as an organisation, that is the church, we tend to live in the moment of lament and ask all of those around us to be there with us rather than moving on into the light of Christ in the community.

Paul in his encouragement to the Corinthians speaks about our willingness to begin anew and start something but then comes his most important words "Now go on and finish it" (2 Cor 8.11a). We are just as likely to fall back into the moment of lament as we are to move forward with the understanding of Christ is by our side. Even in the most inauspicious moments in our lives when we believe there is no hope Christ is there to bring hope. Once we have begun something we need to finish it. We began at baptism with our lives in Christ and as soon as we begin to move into the world we tend to forget our commitment and lament our losses rather than continue on in the commitment to Christ. This falling away is both institutional and personal as we swirl in the crowds of everyday life forgetting that Christ is close to us. It takes courage to reach out in the midst of our despair to try and touch the fringes of the Christic presence. We become discouraged and loose ourselves in the apparent safety of the crowds rather than finding the courage to stretch out and touch to be made whole. Just like the hemorrhagic woman in Mark's gospel (5.25-34) we need the courage of our convictions and not the voice of the crowd.

Have we the faith to reach out from the midst of lament?

In or institutions what happens is that we are set on a way forward onto a path and then when our leader / inspiration moves into another role / life / place we look for another to take their place. Yet, what happens is that another comes and replaces our visions with new ones so that we have to begin again lamenting once more the past. What we are failing to do is grab hold of our vision and running with that vision of Christ by our side to the fulfilment of God's design. Its not you or me it is all of us collectively as Christians. We are like the leader of the synagogue in Mark's gospel that the hemorrhagic woman's story interrupts. We see the death of something we have given birth to or rather we see its imminent demise and believe that that is the end. What if it is not, what if like the daughter in the story the idea is just sleeping deeply only to be woken by Christ's presence (Mk 5.39-43)? So often we believe the professional mourners and do not have the courage to see the spark of life that is Christ in our midst.

We have a tendency to laugh at the ideas of others that would like to take on the path that Christ has walked rather than join with Christ in the walk and be lights along the way. Hope is so easily besmirched and its light hidden by the callousness of modern society. This is especially the case when we involve ourselves in lament. There is a time and place just as David understood but then we must re-visualise the hope that Christ gives us by standing within our midst and healing the old injuries and bring back into the light and joy of love the dead dreams that we put to the side to lament. We need to remind ourselves not to fall back but to continue God's design. In the next year Melbourne is going to enter into this sort of change with the Archbishop laying up his staff and the question is will the vision remain or will it be changed once more to suit our designs and not God's design. 

Facing our modern giants

 Some years ago now in South Africa, I attended a conference in Johannesburg which brought together well over one and half thousand Christians. The theme of the conference was "Giants" the ones that were looming and that needed to be identified and killed as David killed Goliath (1 Sam 17). The giants that the conference were talking about were things that were embedded in society following its move into democratic government; poverty, education, discrimination, corruption, etc. These are not simple things but as Christians we are told that slaying giants is very easy if God is beside us. We should not make the mistake of saying that God is on our side because that implies that there are sides, rather we need to understand that God is beside us walking along the way. Even if he challenges us at the same time with questions that point to our own lack of ability (Job 38.1-11). In our times of giant facing and fear that comes with it is the need to understand that God walks next to us granting us hope and courage to see our way through to ending the menace posed by the giant.

We all face giants at some time in our lives. Those giants may seem totally impossible to overcome and get around to continue our lives. For some those giants may be intimately personal, depression say, or the loneliness confronting us with the death of someone close. They may be slightly more distant such as persistent debt, mortgage repayments, etc. They may not affect us directly but may affect a community to which we belong, escalating costs, reduction in membership, etc. They, of course, may also be large and affect everyone such as those tackled by the conference. It does not matter what the size of our personal or collective giants we need to confront them in the same manner that David did with five pebbles taken from the stream of life. Needless to say, it is all very well to reel of some simple things like, faith, walking with God, love, hope and prayer as examples of pebbles to take into a fight. In the end David used only one of the pebbles not all five, So each pebble is good for one shot at the giants that face us and we have to discern which pebble to use so that we effectively destroy the giant. Is it really as simple as that?

Facing the storm and its giants

No, it is not. Giants are however easily killed what is not so easy is the courage that David had to face, the terrors that the giants form in us. Remember that the rest of the army was terrified of the giant and it was that group terror that paralysed their actions. It was the realisation and example of one person that allowed for the success of the whole. Paul puts it slightly differently in the Corinthian correspondence but essentially the same thought is there and he leads through example in adversity (2 Cor 6. 1-13). We are to be lights in the world, a world that is filled with giants. We need to trust ourselves as well as trusting God's presence. Rachel Botsman (@rachelbotsman) points out that the essence of trusting ourselves is that ability to sit in the presence of doubts and uncertainty in order to learn and eventually grow. The understanding is that we grow from what our uncertainties and fears teach us, quite often reflected in the genre known as LitRPG or MMORPG books. Giants reach out into our hearts and kill us through the fears that creep in as we try to face them. Just as the disciples feared the gathering storm (Mk 4.35-41) we also fear what we cannot easily control. Yet, when the light of Christ is shone into the darkness we are able to overcome the fears and reach out to those who are around us and fear as well. Hope, love, prayer, faith etc are all their to help us in our journey travelling along the way that Christ has opened for us. Conquering the fears that overwhelm us in the presence of God. Facing challenge changes us, facing fear heals us, facing the giants makes us a community to be feared.

Only when we truly overcome the terrors that confront us as a family and community joined together will we become as Christ to our neighbours. Even at the darkest moment in our lives, if we look carefully, we will find that Christ's light is beside us guiding us along the stormy way into the brightness of a new future. In approaching our future, not only as individuals but also as faith communities we also need to come to this understanding and follow David and Christ with courage to face our fears of the future and our doubts as to our abilities. Like David we take it one step at a time, preparing and facing, as it is a giant that we can conquer if we allow ourselves to face the fear we all have that there is little we can do. In facing our future as a community we also have to sit with our uncertainties and trust in ourselves, as well as in God's saving presence to guide us in facing our doubts and fears. It is only when we do this that we can say as the murdered priest, Luis Espinal, wrote "Train us, Lord, to fling ourselves upon the impossible, for beyond the impossible is your grace and your presence; we cannot fall into emptiness. The future is an enigma, our road is covered by mist, but we want to go on giving ourselves, because you continue hoping amid the night and weeping tears through a thousand human eyes".

Seeing the Iceberg

 Last week I spoke of our inability to see with long sight to those things that we need to undertake for the future. This week's readings speak to us of how shallow our sight is, especially when it comes to seeing others for who they are. We rely on what is presumably the shortest sight that we can achieve because it is the quickest and thus for our age the best. We only have to look at the set reading from today particularly the selection of David (1 Sam.16:1-13). Just like everyone else Samuel sees not with God's eyes but with the eyes of the human. A short quick assessment of what is before him allows him to judge the worth of the sons. Too often we too use the quick sight that is shallow to assess our neighbours and what is before us.

It is not only people that we undertake this shallow sight on, it is at the end of the day basically every single thing that we have to look at. What do I mean? Well if we are presented with a new way of doing something we give it a quick glance and then depending on our life experience will make a decision as to whether it is going to be effective or not. Quite often we overlook something that is phenomenal only to kick ourselves later when it becomes obvious that it is the next technique, object or whatever which has become something of desire. I can think of a number of occasions when I was offered something and declined only to never be able to obtain it again. Our shallow gaze often makes us overlook the inherent goodness or rightness in what we are looking at or how it will change our lives for the better. Our shortness of sight and our quickness to take exception lead us into our many downfalls not only as people but as members of our faith.

We need to look at the whole iceberg

We also go on to overlook the smallest of possibilities because we are to focussed on making the grand gesture. We think that because something is small in our eyes then it is worthless especially when it comes to new beginnings. We want to be lavish when we undertake things but as Christ points out in the parables of the seed (Mk. 4:26-34) it is the small beginnings that bring about the most change. In our parishes and our lives we yearn for the big opportunity, the big new start and overlook the small offerings that are made to us each and every day. It is from the smallest acorn that a mighty oak is grown and so for us it is from the smallest and humblest of hearts that the greatest faith and beginning is found. We cannot fathom the incomprehensibility of God's thoughts or plans such that we must make our own as a form of compensation. We dream big and as a result we often do not have our dreams come to fruition. But just think if we were but to plant a small seed of love in someone's life who knows what will grow as a result. That does not mean that we do not dream big but rather allow for a small start that will grow to fulfil our dreaming.

Paul states in the letter to the Corinthians that we are always confident (2 Cor. 5:6). We are totally confident in ourselves. We are confident in our dreams and in our plans, yet we, unlike those that Paul address, are too often not one with the Lord. We do not live in our faith but in our own ideas and our own plans. We belittle others because, more often than not, they do not dream big enough for us. Yet, if we were to see with God's eyes, if we were to look beyond our senses and actually manage to walk in faith we would see a devastatingly different world. We would not shun the small but celebrate the seeds that are sown in the small ways that we reach out to the other. To often we allow what we deem to be the big picture to cloud the compassion that God asks of us and wishes us to take in faith. We are often like the Titanic when we see the surface iceberg we forget that there is a greater depth upon which we might founder. By looking deeper we may avoid the disaster that our surface glance may create. Paul states to the Corinthians that we must not look with human eyes but with the eyes of Christ (2 Cor: 5:16). This means that we must take our time when we are assessing things like new projects, new ways of doing things and new outlooks that are different from what we think we believe. This means that we must also look with the discernment of the Spirit much as how David's kingly abilities were discerned. Only when we are certain of the path that God wishes us to travel can we make decisions that further God's kingdom that allows the sown seeds of faith to grow.

God's future or humanity's present

 I suppose that our transient lives predispose us to looking for short term benefits rather than for long term gains. Just think of Adam and Eve's story as the short term gain takes them away from their comforts (Gen 3.8-15). We prefer a bit of adhockery so as to deal with issues as they arise rather than moving into a new future with planning for future generations. One of the issues with our political system is that those we elect are people who are often a generation behind in their thinking and in what the people of their country are asking for. Simply put those in power are often looking for short term goals to either remain in power or make a quick fix to growing situations. In the reading from 1 Samuel we hear about the Israelites wanting a king (1 Sam 8:4-11) and we know the consequences of getting what is wanted as opposed to what is beneficial and to be desired. In looking for a king, a mortal king / leader the Israelites were not looking towards God nor were they looking at a long term picture. Like our present day they were focussed only on the perceived benefits of the short term goal, a king.

In our own lives we too look for short term gains very rarely we look at the long term. Just think about the increasing presence of short term loan companies like PayPal, etc. Paul in writing to the Corinthians hits the nail on the head when he states that our troubles are slight and short-lived (2 Cor 4:17). This is the reality, if we were to look at things in perspective, we would be a very different society. We are consumed by our short lives and therefore seek to take every advantage we can to become what society portrays as being the best. This could and can be riches, fame, comfort, etc. All of which are geared to our personal taste and wants rather than needs. We would rather spend more on an item that will give us pleasure in the short term rather than seek for a long term gain or goal. There are exceptions, there is no denying the fact that some people go for a long term goal rather than the short term but these are exceptional people and often they are not noticed by society around them. Some are of course quite famous but the fame has not come as a result of seeking it but rather as a result of their example in their selected community. None of us had heard of Mother Theresa until her deeds were published or became famous. How many years had she been doing the things she was doing before she was noticed by the rest of us?

Do we see the future possibilities or the present gains?

Even when we think of our own community it is often with a sight on the short term goal rather than a long term understanding of the future. Let us go back say twenty years in many parishes and you would have found thriving communities with much love in an apparently exciting environment that appeared to be extremely successful. Twenty years on and often those communities are in the midst of struggle because they were unwise in what they sought looking at their success as an ongoing given rather than as the short life that it actually was. Often as parishes and as other spiritually formed communities we look only to gain more people of like mind, bemoan our lacks and recast ourselves into the successes of the past. The moment we have in plenty we do not think to the future but rather think only of the present much the same as do aged politicians who know that they will have no future other than what they have in the present. The question we fail to ask is what does God want from us and our communities?

God does not favour one above the other God loves all. God does not favour our human constraints on what God thinks or wills but wishes for us to become as Christ. What precisely does this mean for us? Well, in the words of Christ "who are my mother and my brothers?" (Mark 3:33) and the answer is not those in the present who believe that they are. The so called guardians of our future who only think of the past or their time. No it is we who are the purveyors of the future and it is we who must look far into the future and strive towards what God wants - all to be as Christ to those around them. It is not the sanctuary of the old church were we were baptised but the community that our children's children would wish for; the one that is free of pain and filled with love and understanding of each others difference. Our riches are not on earth but are present in Christ as we seek for a better world not just for our selves but for all of our companions in Christ wherever and whoever they may turn out to be. They are the unseen future goals not the seen present gains.

Is to hear listening?

 Old Eli took a lot of persuading for him to understand that it was God who called the young Samuel (1 Sam. 3.1-10). Whilst we often suggest that it is prudent to listen and discern God's call in our lives and our lifetime, I wonder how often we actually heed the call as opposed to allowing ourselves to turn over and go back to sleep? Perhaps too often we rely on tradition to suffice and become the call of God. Christ had something to say with regards this type of use of tradition, basically along the lines of "wake up sleepy heads, that is you speaking not God" (Mk 2.23-3.6). The structures of the Church and its institutionalisation are often to blame for this behaviour just as it was at the time of Christ. By placing our reliance on the things that have worked and are working we place ourselves in a place that is often blind to God's working. God cannot be asking us to do that because... We only have to look at the charismatic movement in recent times and the young burgeoning Church in history to see that this is wrong thinking.

How can we wake up and realise that God is calling us to be different and follow where God leads and not where others in the Church want us to believe he leads? How do we tune out, as it were, the noise of the ego's of others and find time for God so that he can lead us? Perhaps the first thing to think about is our own faith lives. It is after all up to us to hear when God speaks and to discern the truth. We cannot do that when we are involved in other things, however worthy they may be. It really could be our children, our livelihoods our passions that distract us so much so that we forget that an integral part of our own life is entwined in the life of Christ. We become ingrained in the habit of Church rather than the habit of faith. Paul sums it up considerable well in the second letter to the Corinthians (4.7-12). We are earthen vessels, we do get distracted, we do follow our own endeavours and we do forget God in our lives. Yet, after all is said and done God is still present, God is still leading if we were only to set time aside for God. We are inclined to make excuses and we are inclined to follow what has gone before. Then when we are given the freedom to undertake a new thing we find ourselves being heavily critiqued for branching out and so wallow in doubt or fear. So we need to spend more time with God.

If we do not listen we cannot hear. 

In granting ourselves the freedom to be with God we are given a greater gift as God's grace becomes manifest within us. The time that we thought we would lose as a result of intentional time with God, is in fact time gained rather than lost. It does however mean that we need to be intentional rather than rely on our habits. This means that time spent with God needs to come at times when we do not come before God out of habit, i.e. Sunday morning. Rather it is time that we deliberately set aside during the week to commune with God. In allowing us this luxury we allow God to direct and enter into our lives more fully. If we do not, we will sleep through the call by God and not respond. or if we do it will be at the last moment and in our rush to respond we will listen to ourselves rather than to God. Rather let us start to put aside time to listen to God and leave ourselves behind. Our wants do not accord with God's but rather oppose all that God has given for us. It is time we start to understand that it is not just service but it is service in the name of God that brings forth love into the world. Be true to God and we will be true to our true selves loving our communities and ensuring that the young strive to become God's children in the world.